Top 10 Cringe Inducing Comments from the Classroom

Oh not this one again
Make it stop

It’s that time of year again.  The time when you send the kiddies back to the teachers, happily skipping away content in your knowledge that summer has ended.  Time for teachers to take up their Expo brand markers, which we still have full stock of because it’s so early in the year, and start trying to mold and shape young minds.  This task would be far easier if it weren’t for the questions or statements which make us cringe like a vegetarian at a barbecue.

Without further ado I bring you the top 10 list of things all teachers loathe to hear…followed by the sarcastic comebacks we all think but most of us contain.  Enjoy.

  1. “Do we have to show our work?” 

Nope.  I’ve really perfected the art of mind reading.  You’re good.

  1. “Is this going to be on the test?”

            Of course not.  I waste your time for my health.  I’m feeling better already.

  1. “Do we have to answer in complete sentences?”

            You speak in complete sentences, therefore you write in complete sentences.

I speak in complete sentences, therefore you write in complete sentences.

  1. “Are you sure it’s not right?”

            Am I sure that 12+7 is not 3,247?  Yeah, pretty sure.

  1. “Seriously?”

            Probably.

  1. “I didn’t.”

            Okay.  Your invisible friend is a jerk.

  1. “What homework?”

            The one you clearly didn’t do.  Eh, at least it’s easy to grade.

  1. “What are we doing?”

            Wasting each other’s time.

  1. “Who says?”

            Someone who has both of us beat in the brains department, friend.

  1. “I forgot, again.”

            At this point it’s not forgetting, it’s a bad habit.

Did I forget any?  Share your favorites in the comments below. 

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