Magical YA, Page 1

I’ve been talking about this MagicalYA story for a long time now. I finished the first draft WAY back in 2019. But then I decided it needed a rewrite. Basically, the book follows two Magical girls in competition for one Magical job. Only one of them can win. The book alternates between their viewpoints, giving them almost perfectly equal page time.

This is (obviously) not the real cover. This is a mockup I did a long time ago when I first started drafting the story. #MagicalYA is what I’ve been calling it. It’s NOT the name of the story. So what is the name of the story? That’s a DARN good question. I’ll let you know when I decide. Have I mentioned I’m bad at titles?

But in 2019 I noticed, coincidentally after writing this blog post, that the story needed more background. Background those two girls were not qualified to give.

So I added a third viewpoint. This one doesn’t get the same amount of equal page time (it’s about 25% while the other girls split the remaining 75% of the pages, give or take) but I thought it would add background and depth.

I let the book sit, untouched, for a few months. Ok, a lot of months. It’s JUNE already. How did that happen? I’m rereading it right now and WHOA the new point-of-view WORKS for this story. The chapters are timed just right to give you the answers you needed (or, in some cases, didn’t even know you had until it’s mentioned).

Anyway, now that we’re approaching the beta reader phase and I’m falling in LOVE with this story all over again, I wanted to bring you the first page.

It is my hope that you will READ it, COMMENT with your impressions, and tell me if it grabs your attention.

Yes, it’s only the first page. But first pages are important, aren’t they?

Chapter One-December 27

Angela

Tucked in a valuable private alcove of the crowded hallway, I swipe my hand in a circle along the beige painted bricks and watch the image spawn in the wake of my hand. In a flash I’m looking at my tiny blond sister, eating a bowl of oatmeal with one hand while she thumbs something on her phone screen with the other. The blue bowl and the wooden table are both instantly familiar to me, but only by sight. I haven’t spent enough time there to imagine the feel of the table. My nostalgia is tainted by my years spent here, at the Academy. As I watch, Mom rushes into the room dressed for work, in heels and a skirt. Her hands are working at her right ear, fastening an earring. She leans down, kissing Evelyn on the forehead and swiping the phone from her hands in one practiced motion. “Finish up, we have ten minutes.”

That’s my cue. I swipe the image off the wall and unlock my cell phone. I click on the favorite button with the picture of her dirty blonde hair swept up in a bun and the call starts. It rings only twice before Mom answers, breathless. “Angela, honey, how are you?”

“I’m great, Mom. I don’t have a lot of time before class, but I wanted to say good morning.”

“We are just having breakfast, getting ready to head out. How’s school?”

I look around the hallway, watch kids rush to get where they’re going. Third period will start any second now. I don’t really have time to chat. Of course, that’s why I’m calling right now. With the time difference, Mom is getting ready to head out when I’m getting to my third period. We’re both busy, which means there’s not a lot of time for questions. You see, most of what my Mom knows about the school I’m standing in is a total lie. I hate lying to her. “Same as always, nothing to worry about,” I answer.

“Grades are good?” 

“Of course. All passing.” Grades wouldn’t really tell the whole story right now. I’m in my final year at the Academy. Everything I am doing now relates directly to learning to control my Spark. No more math, no more science. Our focus is on learning the occupations that are out there, because I’ve got one week left before I may be the person who is controlling all of the Magic in the world.

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